[Deshawn]

But ya, I won’t hide from the fact that I failed several attempts at making signature moves. Each failure added fuel because it made me feel more and more alone in the game, but it also motivated me to cause more chaos in the game. The way I saw it, I had no chance by sucking up to the majority and playing safe, so I always tried to take a big shot and my strategy socially was getting people excited about it. People weren’t gonna be down if this was “maybe gonna happen” so I would over-promise and hope that it would be the night that people decided to make the move, but it just never worked out and I apologize if that negatively impacted any of your games. If I was able to land one of these, there’s probably a good chance I would’ve won, or at least claimed some sort of control in the game for the time being, but I have no regrets with how I played. I wanted to be entertaining, but I didn’t want to be as chaotic as I was. I just couldn’t trust anyone on Ancha fully besides Shan and I always felt like I was fighting for my life in the game, so my guard was always up.

Why didn't you try to get me to flip until my last night? I know you were always working on flipping people to vote for me but why didn't you try to do the opposite? Cuz I would hear from all those people how hard you were pushing for a flip, and you the 2 of us had a thing ppl didn't know about. And I always told you I understood why you did it so it's not like I was closing the door on working with you.And for the record, I did consider the flip on Evvie the night I left. It just felt like it was too little too late and in terms of you finally pitching something to me and I figured you were just playing me then. 

[Shan]

I’m assuming Leslie JR and Shan thought Xander was gonna vote with them and he didn’t. Yet another swing and a miss 

once again JR *SWORE* he had people he did not   I think every round since merge he's insisted he's had the numbers and it's fallen through every time.  I decided to risk it because I'd rather get 7th than 4th.  

Honestly did not expect Xander's vote to be so fucking mean though, that fat cunt

Just want to say for the record that if you and Leslie (my closest allies at the time) voted for Abraham instead of Sara with me, we actually would’ve had the numbers and this game would’ve turned out very differently.

Yes but if I’m remembering correctly, only because somebody happened to throw their vote on Leslie again, not because you actually had people. Don’t forget, you would be swearing you had the numbers, but those numbers would be talking to me at the same time telling me what you were plotting and that they were humoring you and not actually going to do it.  I was very close with Abe and Evvie so Abe was less of a concern to me, and splitting up Xander/Sara seemed like better move for me at the time because neither one of them was with me (i mean Sara was literally saying my name that round) and I felt like Abe had my back. Abe/Evvie/Deshawn would talk to me about how Sara was calling all the shots and at one point Abe actually said to me “I think we should just let Sara run the merge” and I was like what the fuck?? Obviously in hindsight I wish I’d taken the chance during the Jaime and Sara boots but I don’t know how I could have known that at the time— it would have been pure luck that it worked. 

[Heather]

Sara/Xander was the reason for the Jaime vote if I recall correctly. They were scared about her social game or something but Sara said on the thread that he was high and just threw a name out to Abe lmao. Abe and Evvie kinda latched onto it and it was decided.  I was pushing for Erik to go at first which I should have pushed for more but I backed off because i remember Xander saying something about not liking how ‘aggressive’ or ‘pushy’ (can’t remember the exact wording) Sara was and didn’t want that label to fall on me which was really stupid in hindsight. Then JR snitched on me and since I didn’t want to look like I was going rogue which I kinda planning on doing I just followed the crowd. 

[Shan]

Sara/Xander was the reason for the Jaime vote if I recall correctly. They were scared about her social game or something but Sara said on the thread that he was high and just threw a name out to Abe lmao. Abe and Evvie kinda latched onto it and it was decided.  I was pushing for Erik to go at first which I should have pushed for more but I backed off because i remember Xander saying something about not liking how ‘aggressive’ or ‘pushy’ (can’t remember the exact wording) Sara was and didn’t want that label to fall on me which was really stupid in hindsight. Then JR snitched on me and since I didn’t want to look like I was going rogue which I kinda planning on doing I just followed the crowd. 

Heather I wish we had gone rogue together Tbh I uderestimated you at first, but as your sassy personality started to emerge I was like damn I actually kind of love this girl I also played a little safer than I wanted to, I just felt like the moment I finally betrayed Ancha had to be SOLID otherwise they'd be so pissed I'd be out next, and I just couldn't find one more solid foothold outside of Leslie and JR.  And JR (love you buddy ) had told people every round that I was ready to flip in his effort to get more numbers, so I had to work double time to try and convince them I was Ancha all the way while my org soul was slowly dying lolllll.  I also wanted Erik to go first, I voted for him by myself in that stupid poll  

[Shan]

Wait that’s hilarious. And, tbh, if JR hadn’t snitched on me the night of the merge I would have been down to flip on Ancha as I had been talking about betraying Abe in my confessionals since the beginning.

But man is JR a wild ally to have

You would give me a little hope then rip it away You were pretty much always in my long term plans, even pre merge, and I so badly wanted you to jump ship with me! It was so close to happening the round Jaime went home. Deshawn unexpectedly throwing his vote broke my heart, I would not have voted Jaime if I’d thought there was ANY hope of that happening. I wish Deshawn had talked to me about how much he loved her, maybe we could have made something happen

I wish I did! That's the part of the game where we sort of "lost touch" for a little while (not the power outtage thing, lol) so I tried to keep it simple

True   In my mind you were already firmly Abe's and Xander's and I had limited resources at several points (orgs are draining, babies are draining, playing orgs and raising a baby is the ultimate soul suck ) and I decided to focus what I had on the  people I thought were with me the most and foster those relationships, instead of spreading myself too thin with everyone.  I'm not sure that I would have even believed you if you told me you wanted to save Jaime lol, but it is fun to think about how the game could have been different if we had.

[Jaime]

I appreciate all of you saying you wish you keep me around at least alittle longer honestly I think I fucked up because I thought Sara and Xander were together based off of stuff I was hearing but I think Xander wanted us to think that so we didn’t think he was so tight with Deshawn Evvie and Abe and it worked 

I was pushing hard to work with Deshawn Evvie and Abe so I could be safe for a few votes which was dumb because little did I know they had a tight 4 person alliance they had all the power which is why they wanted to let someone else drive the first few votes (Sara) to keep their alliance on the DL not a bad move just the safe move

Leslie told me she had Shan in her corner so my ultimate goal was to work with Leslie Shan and JR at the time JR was pushing for Kallpa to work with Sara and Xander which in hindsight was a really bad call but i didn’t know any better because no one would talk to me

hindsight is always 20-20 I’m just honestly happy to know that no one ever got bad vibes from me and you all would have been happy to play with me if the game would have worked out that way because I really felt in the outs toward the end 

I was really bitter about getting 11th place for a while because I felt I played a great game pre merge and I deserved better but after Deshawn joined and realizing how everyone felt toward me has made me view it differently because honestly better having that kind of impact and coming in 11th VS making it to the end with a god complex and not caring about how you make others feel

so to sum up my rant I’m really proud of myself and happy I got to play with you all and this is a really great group to be in a jury with

[Jean-Robert]

You’re awesome Jaime, I’ve missed you!

[Jaime]

I also want to add I think you all played the best possible game you could have given the circumstances well except Deshawn sorry Deshawn love you man but you were at the bottom of your alliance and I just wish you turned on them before they turned on you sorry it didn’t work out that way

You (Deshawn) and JR definitely deserve to still be in the game vs those 3 stupid cunts 

[Jean-Robert]

once again JR *SWORE* he had people he did not   I think every round since merge he's insisted he's had the numbers and it's fallen through every time.  I decided to risk it because I'd rather get 7th than 4th.  

Honestly did not expect Xander's vote to be so fucking mean though, that fat cunt

Just want to say for the record that if you and Leslie (my closest allies at the time) voted for Abraham instead of Sara with me, we actually would’ve had the numbers and this game would’ve turned out very differently.

Yes but if I’m remembering correctly, only because somebody happened to throw their vote on Leslie again, not because you actually had people. Don’t forget, you would be swearing you had the numbers, but those numbers would be talking to me at the same time telling me what you were plotting and that they were humoring you and not actually going to do it.  I was very close with Abe and Evvie so Abe was less of a concern to me, and splitting up Xander/Sara seemed like better move for me at the time because neither one of them was with me (i mean Sara was literally saying my name that round) and I felt like Abe had my back. Abe/Evvie/Deshawn would talk to me about how Sara was calling all the shots and at one point Abe actually said to me “I think we should just let Sara run the merge” and I was like what the fuck?? Obviously in hindsight I wish I’d taken the chance during the Jaime and Sara boots but I don’t know how I could have known that at the time— it would have been pure luck that it worked. 

Totally understand where you’re coming from. Again, I had two Kallpas and a dream, just tried to get people excited about making the big move. Pretty sure Xander voted for Leslie because he was unwilling to vote Sara personally, but didn’t want to deviate from it actually happening. Me Heather Sara voted Abe. Then Abe Deshawn Shan Leslie Evvie voted Sara…

[Jean-Robert]

But ya, I won’t hide from the fact that I failed several attempts at making signature moves. Each failure added fuel because it made me feel more and more alone in the game, but it also motivated me to cause more chaos in the game. The way I saw it, I had no chance by sucking up to the majority and playing safe, so I always tried to take a big shot and my strategy socially was getting people excited about it. People weren’t gonna be down if this was “maybe gonna happen” so I would over-promise and hope that it would be the night that people decided to make the move, but it just never worked out and I apologize if that negatively impacted any of your games. If I was able to land one of these, there’s probably a good chance I would’ve won, or at least claimed some sort of control in the game for the time being, but I have no regrets with how I played. I wanted to be entertaining, but I didn’t want to be as chaotic as I was. I just couldn’t trust anyone on Ancha fully besides Shan and I always felt like I was fighting for my life in the game, so my guard was always up.

Why didn't you try to get me to flip until my last night? I know you were always working on flipping people to vote for me but why didn't you try to do the opposite? Cuz I would hear from all those people how hard you were pushing for a flip, and you the 2 of us had a thing ppl didn't know about. And I always told you I understood why you did it so it's not like I was closing the door on working with you.And for the record, I did consider the flip on Evvie the night I left. It just felt like it was too little too late and in terms of you finally pitching something to me and I figured you were just playing me then. 

Yeah, that’s one of my biggest mistakes in this game, not going to hide from it. The way I saw it, you were running things with the inner Ancha core and I felt like rumbling the Ancha tribe wouldn’t sound ideal to you, especially being that it was kind of known that you were playing the best game out of them and that if you rode that to the end you would’ve probably won. I did really enjoy our talks and was not trying to BS you, I just kind of had a respect for you from a distance and knew that I was going to have to play against you if I wanted a chance to make it far in the game.

[Jaime]

The three of them wanted the target on Deshawn because he was the bottom of their alliance but wanted it to seem he was the one in control they did do a good job deflecting power that’s why they let Sara control the vote at times they just kept trying to keep themselves out of the light but they did a real shitty job getting people to like them so now they have one bitter jury to deal with

I can’t wait for final tribal I’m bringing a giant basket of tomatoes for heather because they are gonna be flying and I’m LIVING for it 

[Heather]

Sara/Xander was the reason for the Jaime vote if I recall correctly. They were scared about her social game or something but Sara said on the thread that he was high and just threw a name out to Abe lmao. Abe and Evvie kinda latched onto it and it was decided.  I was pushing for Erik to go at first which I should have pushed for more but I backed off because i remember Xander saying something about not liking how ‘aggressive’ or ‘pushy’ (can’t remember the exact wording) Sara was and didn’t want that label to fall on me which was really stupid in hindsight. Then JR snitched on me and since I didn’t want to look like I was going rogue which I kinda planning on doing I just followed the crowd. 

Heather I wish we had gone rogue together Tbh I uderestimated you at first, but as your sassy personality started to emerge I was like damn I actually kind of love this girl I also played a little safer than I wanted to, I just felt like the moment I finally betrayed Ancha had to be SOLID otherwise they'd be so pissed I'd be out next, and I just couldn't find one more solid foothold outside of Leslie and JR.  And JR (love you buddy ) had told people every round that I was ready to flip in his effort to get more numbers, so I had to work double time to try and convince them I was Ancha all the way while my org soul was slowly dying lolllll.  I also wanted Erik to go first, I voted for him by myself in that stupid poll  

I underestimated you as well in the beginning but you turned out to be a force. After you told me about Evvie, I trusted you fully and everything I ever said to you was the truth/how I viewed any given situation. I never ratted on you or shared any of the info you gave me. 

We both danced around our feelings of going rogue but never flat out said it to the other. I just knew there was no one I could trust outside of Ancha after our first tribal as I felt like the other side really wanted me out so I had to hinge my bets with the group. When it became apparent that no one thought i could win anyway, I threw caution to the wind and decided to finally just go for it. Rather go out after trying something than get blindsided. 

Also, I do apologize if my parting words at the end messed up your game in any capacity. I originally wasn’t going to mention you at all but I wanted Evvie and Abe to know that they were exposed. 

[Jeff Probst]

The eternal Stranded Meme: All the jurors realizing they could be in the finals if they had stuck together instead.

[Deshawn]

Seems so logical in hindsight...

[Shan]

The eternal Stranded Meme: All the jurors realizing they could be in the finals if they had stuck together instead.

ugh we would have been such a better alliance

[Shan]

Deshawn, who knew about your stray vote for Leslie?

[Deshawn]

I told Abe and Xander and one of them for sure told Evvie because she mentioned it to me in passing days later. 
 

[Deshawn]

I told them after I did it though, no one knew before the vote. Abe knew before the Sara vote and Xander knew after that 

[Shan]

I told them after I did it though, no one knew before the vote. Abe knew before the Sara vote and Xander knew after that 

Abe really let me guess to him that it was Evvie, then told Evvie I said it and got me in trouble with her, all the while telling me that he "hoped" that it was you and that you had thrown your vote out of loyalty to Leslie, knowing that was the case the whole time   That's such bullshit lol.

[Shan]

And the other stray Leslie vote later on was Xander?  Which I also got blamed for